I Don't Wanna

This past weekend I was wrestling with myself about committing to a new schedule/routine. 

I couldn't land on anything that "felt" good, which kept me thinking that once I found the perfect solution, I'd feel better.

No matter how I rearranged my schedule, the settled feelings I was expecting didn't come and I was telling myself "this is too hard."

As I was talking it out with my mentor/coach she challenged me about my thought "It's too hard." 

I mean, creating a schedule is actually pretty easy. There are only so many options with 24 hours in a day.

What I discovered is that I often tell myself "It's too hard" when I don't like my options.

The truth is "I don't want to have to do this." Even when it's something I've chosen. Maybe you can relate?

Brene Brown's research tells us that our words literally shape our experiences. Which means that I was making this hard, when it really wasn't. 

Check out my thought model:

Circumstance: Planning a new weekly schedule.

Thought: This is too hard.

Feeling: Frustration

Actions: trying to solve for "hard" (that's not even the issue) hence not looking at the truth of the situation, not slowing down to understand my situation, not feeling my feelings, indecisive, not committing, avoiding. 

Result: I make it harder than it is.

When I use words that are more aligned with the truth, here's what that model looks like:

Circumstance:  Planning a new weekly schedule.

Thought: Part of me doesn't want to do this at all.

Feeling:  Self-compassion

Actions: I create a weekly schedule and commit to it. I feel my true feelings about it. I use simple self-directed neuroplasticity tools to help me manage my emotions, I don't tell myself it's too hard. I show up even when I don't like it and it feels doable.

Result: I follow my schedule and my emotions don't dictate what I do or don't do. 

What are you telling yourself about things you don't want to do? 

What would happen if you just chose to feel your true feelings and do the thing anyway?